Lamest. Conspiracy. Theories. Ever.

Thomas Pynchon is really Thomas Pynchon, only with better teeth.

KFC prevented by law from calling itself 'Kentucky Fried Chicken'; delicious 100 per cent chicken-based product in fact from Alabama.

1969 moon landing footage shot on Neptune, not moon.

Israeli government run by bunch of Jews.

Oswald actually aiming for Zapruder.

Asian man warned me about going to Bradford last week, described it as 'total dump'.

Very boring and quite possibly meaningless sounds have been encoded into the heavy metal records I've been listening to backwards lately.

Shape-changing brain-eating lizards are secretly running this country, and I for one think they're doing a bloody good job.

'Doncaster' 'exists'.